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Concept Of Self vs Others Efficiency and Safety

I.T. Support Bettered by Conceptual awareness of self vs others

I started working on computers in people's homes and offices for pay around 16 years old. One thing i quickly learned was that some clients have issues. Or rather, they dont know how to stand back and let you do your thing. This if left unchecked produces an inferior result due to the multi-tasking of managing interaction with them, their level of anxiety and trying to do what you are hired to do. It also ends up costing them more and there's a balance between what you can charge and what you should feel out is a max anyone will pay. for me there was also the desire not to take advantage of people. 

the one person i knew for a brief but intense moment that likely had parents almost to mines level if not worse in some ways direct comparisons face issues... but closest to mine and i didnt see mine for what they were at the time... at one point this person and i were talking later and i had figured more of it out. something i haven't seen psych address too in-depth but have seen mentioned intermittently is 

GUILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLT trips. which i think known or otherwise ends up burning or blunting conscience when combined with trauma and recreating npd or aspd. just my theory. but partly because that was a decent description and partly because i like taking pride in what i do and not ripping people off... 

I dont want to charge exorbitant amounts and never have wanted to. I dont want to be ripped off either. 

long and short of it is, if a customer wanted to talk id love to shoot the shit off the clock but it didnt feel right at 25 to 35  an hr (like 2004) 

As ive observed more people in general and been open with my self to reflect ... Its like they just lack the idea someone might understand something they dont. what i had found with that type is if I can get the to let me work (or sometimes suggest i will return with their computer tomorrow or the next day).
basically if they are happy with the result the first time, the next time will be way more cost and time effective for everyone because what ever damage they have to that concept is satisfied if they get a decent bill and the computer now performs to expectation or better or has the feature/software... 

the lack of that concept and probably trust issues (some justified but im aware of normal vs bit more than and not talking about the first category) is a double edged swoard because even if you try to explain what youre doing (which decreases the mode switch and multi task inefficiency but still adds to distraction and cognitive load) the process of doing it slows the repair or upgrade and troubleshooting something immediately obvious while distracted is just all around not something to try while distracted.

the act of managing them because of their issues might result in having issues with the repair and then neither party ends up satisfied with the encounter. meaning it was not a great use of time for either. 

eventually I got pretty good at this aspect. as a result there was rarely a client i didnt get repeat business from. 

Dangerous to Parent With Out It

my mom is probably the best illustration of this. My first word was lightbulb . often at my grandmas, i would be asked to clean the gutters, look at a light switch, handy man sorta things. My mom is terrified of electricity. so she asks me to do something assuming i know a bit (or maybe better me than her :/) but fact is i do. I've since wired entire panels and on the dc side of things can repair and or to some extent design circuits. 

but all the sudden at a crucial moment shes crying out to be careful. maybe driving is a better example. when i first got my liscense she would fling her hand tworads the radio dial as we came to a stop. I think what goes on is she cant trust me behind the wheel and is hightened alert then her brain says...tooo much stimuli while im trying to judge if hes going to stop in time.

but what she was doing because she couldnt control her emotions or trust her son (for the record my second behind the wheel with permit, my instructor took a nap and thanked me greatly because she said next person was going to be a nightmare) what my mom was doing caught my periprial vision usualy at a time my attention needed to be focused on either a nornal stop or say someone is entering the lane unexpectedly...

I was self-aware enough and foreign mind aware enough at 16 i could explain this to her. It didnt stop her. 

an aha moment i wasnt alone in figuring these concepts out. now im beginging to see an interplay with exactly how it can hurt rasing a child or in an organization ... meanwhile theres less than netural intentions and to save face or "get what they want when they want" im being smeared...

We Need Legal Reform

If the us wants to stay competitive with other nations we need effenciey and creativity. theres a chance that at the moment someone at the upper echelons probably behind gov has decided too many people for their planet. I sure hope thats not the case. but assuming its not

if we want to end DV or take a real swipe at it I think we need to focus on healthy instead of fear based parenting. We need to redefine the role of cps to make them more consoler than atf dea and dui cop that takes your kids.

I've never known a kid to be taken for what the APA know makes a child 3x 4x more likely to be BPD.

I cant say for certain ive read enough and i certainly dont have the degree, other than family I can usually spot BPD, ASPD and NPD (though the later two are harder to pull apart) all of them share traits to a high degree. I am convinced that most of this is learned behavior and or damage. 

But who is most likely to further abuse the next gen? doesnt empathy and sypathy moderate ones ability to go off on someone undeserved? is it possible this could spiral if not checked? is it possible thats what cancel culture mainly consists of? 

Why It helps the economy
I have to extend this later but concepts like OST OD Theory, Cockpit CRM, Kelly Johnsons Rules for skunkworks.

theres been some consensus that hire competent people, have a well-defined task, stay out of their way. 
with out sympathy and empathy and possibility of weak conscience I cant see the concept of social reciprocity holding  people that cut throat each other and tend to see in black and white ... like dantes inferno home and work. the dead pull down those trying to crawl out and at the next level someone is kicking your fingers and or head. 

managers out for themselves with npd or bpd are likely to stomp underlings. this destroys creativity and slows things down. 

we are also way past the age of black and white. there might come some revolution but everything is highly technical. they say npd and aspd have issues with gray matter deficiency.
its been said for a long time that china can copy not innovate. (see jet engines) well, id have to wonder if its even more common in their culture to end up cluster b. but back to ours; id think these people would lack the ability to bring us to innovation. ie they can preforme wrote technical tasks but the gray matter and splitting/all or nothing...

most ah moments involve between the lines. 


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