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Social Awareness (work in progress)

 One Of the Biggest Issues those abused regardless by who is the possibly themselves damaged persons insistence that they are telling lies. that didnt or that couldnt happen. 

The more i think it through and learn the more terrifying that response is. NPD and in my experience BPD feature damaged mental construct of what and or who other people are. which espicially parent to child equates to damage to outright nuking of what should be a teen rasing healthy interpersonal boundries. there is also likely some disruption of the propagation and or cross application of the concept of object permanence 

Object permanence in a nut shell is why infants are surprised at peekaboo because the connection between not seeing it and it still can exist if i dont see it isnt there yet. it might be you. 

I've noted someone with diagnosed bpd to have posted they found it distrubing people they hadent seen for years have a mental picture of who they were. aka the concepts of the external person has all the functions the cluster b person has and or rights to those functions is clashing with realization other people have them or a memory at all, especially after a few year period of absence (peeka, thats creepy you would remember me. good thing we arnt starting to base laws on feelings right? oh...) 

what i find scary about the insisting something an external party wasnt present for didnt happen is how much it demonstrates the person doing it has the same issue, for reasons similar to why memory in absence is "creepy". that and instead of sympathy and or empathy or even silence you might find someone is insisting on what is or isnt your reality and admiently despite their lack of presence for the events they are so sure did or did not happen. 

worse yet we want to believe especially with parents that they love and care for their children. 

but want to believe is something that should be reserved for the hope of intelligent life in the universe or on earth and fictional x-files agents. 

wanting to believe someone wasn't abused despite them communicating they were or might have been ends up compounding the problem. It also helps trap people in the situation. 

Feminism has done some a service but many a disservice. good concepts like positions of power and victim blaming have been commandeered and average Joe plumber or Jill I.T. specialist may have only ever heard them in the context of men doing it to women. 

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